I heard O screaming in the bathroom this evening and, when I went to check on him, it turned out he had had a spider on his neck.
I showed no reaction so I wouldn't add to the panic. I checked my own neck privately in case spiders were lurking somewhere.
This reminded me of smiling at T when he split his head open.
I almost sang cheerfully that everything was fine, as I washed the bright red blood that was covering his head and face.I was secretly terrified.
Same thing when Z got a croup attack and almost couldn't breathe. Or the time I calmed him with reassurances while he screamed as they stitched his face.
After the stitches, as I tried to stand up, my legs almost gave way.
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